When the sweet people at Jelly Belly send us Gurus stuff to review, in this case, Easter Candy, I have to ask myself: how fair can I really be? These people ARE doing the lords work. Plus, they send samples to both me and Jonny – separately – and they include personal notes and loads of info. That gets them 2.5 out of 5 stars just out of the box, so to speak.

But will put aside all the company feel-goodness and get to eating/reviewing the Jelly Belly Sour Bunnies.

Wow did I have high hopes for these going in. For one, Jelly Belly is one of the few candy makers, if not the only candy maker to get flavors right, and the staples in this bag are always good to go: Apple, Cherry Grape and Lemonade.

Also, look at the colors — those lemon sugar crystals and pretty packaging — does it not clearly say, “Eat the shit out of me. These will rock your body body.” ?

Now being the super dad I am, I wasn’t going to dive into these without the kiddies. I’m all ABOUT sharing the love. So the 3 of us gave them a good go ’round. (YES, I also offered to Mrs. Guru but she semi-disdains candy that isn’t chocolate plus it’s way too early in the morning for her.)

OK let’s get it out of the way upfront: of course the kids liked these. They would give them 5 stars out of the gate. They’re kids for chrissake with no discerning taste buds yet, who would eat sugar all day long and even during sleep if they could figure out how.

But here’s the rundown:

Apple: tastes like it…sorta. Sour green apple maybe but not really sour. More tart. “Sweety”, as one kid put it. This was the older kid’s fave: “I liked the light tartness in it, and I like apples.”

Cherry: tastes like the general cherry. Again, not so sour. Kind of a miss for me since I like the cherry jelly belly jelly bean a lot. This flavor wasn’t as strong nor tart as that.

Grape: “Way more sour,” says one kid. “Tastes like medicine grape,” says the other. (Funnily, I LOVE medicine grape. This one had the strongest actual flavor. Again, not so sour – no matter what the kid said. This was the other kid’s favorite: “Kinda of sour and tarty – and very sweet sugary.” (Great description! Zzzz)

Lemonade: Probably the most sour of the bunch (which would make sense) but again, more tart than sour. I “feel” the lemonade overtones but it’s too floral. It almost tastes like the whiff you get when you open a jar/cannister of Country Time Lemonade. One kid said it was like biting into a lemon. “It’s like eating lemonade.” FWIW, I totally disagree. Gawd kids are dum.

To wrap up, I was a bit underwhelmed. But the JB crowd is trying, and dammit if they’re not doing the lord’s work. I’ll cut them some slack. It is Easter next week and someone is dying for someone’s sins here. Oh wait. Maybe someone is resurrecting for someone else’s sins? Hm. Not sure. I’m reading Game of Thrones right now, not the Bible.