Cotton Candy: I like it. There. I said it. Gottanissue widat?

Cotton candy, also called candy floss, is sweet.

Reviewed by Matty

December 3, 2012


Did you know in the UK they call Cotton Candy “Candy Floss”? At first I thought that was the dumbest name ever because most of us think floss as something to clean your teeth. Then I realized those Brits (and Welsh and Scots) are the most clever people ever. The irony is outrageous! Can you imagine FLOSSING your teeth with SUGAR STRANDS?! OMG! LMFAOLSIA!

Now us Candy Gurus been at this candy review gig for a few years and we’ve made some pretty good friends. Some we’d watch football with, some we might sleep with, but most are just the wonderful kind who send you free stuff. Like the cats at Candy Galaxy. These peeps send a relative smorgasbord of goods semi-regularly to Jonny, and he shares none of it with me, and then he reviews it. I made my puppy dog hurt eyes to him the other day and he threw me a virtual bone in the form of said Cotton Candy.

We actually got this for Halloween, as you can see above. You can still get it for post-Halloweensies. A 12-pack of these little buckets is only $15.29. That’s inexpensive as all get out. I have one pail and it’s bottomless. It literally has no end — I just keep going back for more.

Plus Candy Galaxy says “It’s been scientifically proven that no one can eat cotton candy without breaking out in a smile.” So there’s always that.

Some cotton candies taste a tad plain, or just sweet and semi fruity or like bubble gum. That’s fine for me. This Candy Galaxy cotton candy though had multiple flavors in it. It was swirled. I tasted a dash of banana and strawberry, for example.

Honestly, I think Cotton Candy gets a bad rap. Yes, it’s hard to eat it (sticky fingers) let alone procure it (“hey, I’d like some cotton candy please.” “I don’t see a kid with you.” “It’s for me.” “oh so you’re a loser.”) but dammit, it tastes good. And it lasts and lasts. Also, ever checked the fat content on cotton candy package? No you haven’t, because there is none. And do you think the cotton candy caloric content will be sky high? Actually, no. A huge thing of cotton candy has less calories than a pack of M&M’s. Yes, I made that up but it could be true.

So look, go to Candy Galaxy, buy their cotton candy, and you don’t have to be embarrassed or harrassed and you can actually lose weight. Not sure those things are connected though.

Zolli Candy


  1. jonnyguru

    Great review. One thing you didn’t touch on (idiot) is that the packaging em really is smart. Cotton candy from the ballpark always goes bad in a the plastic bag. In this tomb like Tupperware package, that crap will survive the apocalypse. #doomsdaypreppers

    • matty

      good points. plus, you can put your weed in it.


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