Emoji Gummies …yes, really.

Oh yay novelty gummies. Again.

Reviewed by Jonny

December 1, 2017

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I opened the package from Suzy in Germany eagerly-it’s always fun to see what kind of stuff she gets for us.


and on the back:


Ok.  But we’re not done yet. Then there was this.

and on the back of that one:

That’s some bawdy shit for a candy company to be hurling out there. Literally. No issues there.

Here’s the breakdown of the Be Happy gummies:

……I’m so confused.  There’s 4 leaf clovers, thumbs up, heart, sun, happy face….and sad face.  Oh, also there’s a shit emoji in here. I don’t know if this is some maniacal trolling, or if there’s any logic behind this.  It makes no to less than no sense.  Additionally perplexing, each shape is a specific flavor, many interesting like lime and pineapple-except the poo, which comes in all flavors. Just mull this over for a sec, and we’ll look at the Shit Happens gummies, and pick it up after that.

Sigh. For these, we have the three monkeys-see no evil, speak no evil, hear no evil. Also present is the middle finger, thumbs down, and….poop. Spoiler: ALL of these shapes have the same cola flavor.

Who thought these items signified “shit happens”? Why on EARTH are the 3 monkeys here?  And then you start thinking about the Smile gummies again, what really is driven home is the ultimate message of this confectioner: it doesn’t matter if you’re happy, sad, angry, or depressed.  Life-when it comes down to it-is always gonna be poo.


Anyhow, to the candy.  It was a forgone conclusion that these would suck.  10 out of 10 times, if you see this kind of novelty gummy in the States, it 100% for sure will suck.  It will be the same soft, nondescript flavored milquetoast gas station gummies you’ve had before.

But nay, I say.  NAY! One piece of these things and I did a double take. Bursting with flavor, and sneaky tart, I was seriously impressed. It had to be a fever dream brought on by the perplexing message this candy maker is trying to convey.  So I had another, and another.  I’m sold.  These are wonderfully bright, chewy, and really extremely flavorful.  The Be Happy gummies are bit more special than the Shit Happens, as there’s only one flavor of shit- cola.  It’s a very good cola, harkening back to that classic cola gummy bottle jam, but still, the other bag takes it.

Honestly, the IS the first time novelty and taste has ever collided in the right way for me.  I treasure these, and their nihlist hopeless message.  Hell, they’re even available on Amazon-But for a ridiculous price.  You want pay $22 for a bag of gummies?  I mean, I HAVE, but I don’t want to and you should either.  Having said that, there’s a link below.  I’m sure they’l become more commonplace on Amazon soon, or they disappear, never to be seen again.


It’s hard to tell which, but let’s back in its beauty while we have this time together.


Zolli Candy


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