Sometimes I have a lot to say about sweets. In this case, I have almost nothing. Remember Scotty? He used to be a part of Candy Gurus until we all realized he’s lame and kicked him out. Kidding! Sort of. He’s still our boy, and while he doesn’t write fro the Gurus any longer, he does provide us with candy when he travels, even when it’s…vile, vile crap.
I know. I was thinking the same thing when I saw it. I held out hope though, that this might be yet another amazing UK candy that I’m only now discovering.
Hey, it looks like sidewalk chalk!
Guess what? It literally tastes like it too. The deal with this shite is that you can break off a piece, and as you suck it, it rapidly breaks down into a spongy, soft…vomit-like mess. Getting hungry?
No flavor, no purpose, no nothing. Yet the Brits LIKE this shit. I visited many UK sites where the common refrain was “You asked for them, and they’re back!”. Know what? Keep this crap over there. We’ll trade you for some licorice and Haribo.
Having said all that, if you’re into self punishment, I’ve provided a Canadian link at the bottom of this post. Additionally, “The Human Centipede 2” is coming out soon, so why not take a box of these to the movies?
Thanks for nothing, Scotty! Again! (See what I did there?)
Everything about this review is the opposite of what people want to read in candy reviews.
I couldn’t be prouder.
Wait, are you suggesting that the Brits have given us something vile to eat? That exemplar of fine cuisine? Surely you jest!