But let’s just get casual and call them fruit jellies, nnnkaaaayyyyy?
We’ve been on a roll lately, reviewing the hell out of fruit jellies. Therefore, when I saw that there was an American candy company making them (for quite some time, actually), I had to reach out. They reached back. We had a moment. And then there were these:
A big, honkin’, beautiful 12 ounce box of fruit jellies. On their website, Cranberry Sweets quotes a food writer’s 1986 description of these treats, and it sets the bar high: “These cubes of jellied fruit-lightly dusted with sugar, and boasting intense, pure flavor-are to Chuckles what fresh sorbet is to the popsicle.” Well done, Florence Fabricant. Well said.
Oh, you want to see them?
It was at this point that I uttered something like “Gahhhh!”. 5 rows of 6 flavors: Cranberry, Marion Blackberry, Red Raspberry, Key Lime, Ruby Red Grapefruit & orange. Absolutely inspired flavor selection. And the ingredients list is short, and all natural. Just fruit, fruit oil, pectin, corn syrup & tartaric acid. So far, so good.
Whoah. These things are generous! Each piece is a convenient two bites. But where some fruit jellies we’ve reviewed lately are more on the firm side, these , while certainly keeping the correct fruit jelly consistency, are silky. And the flavors pop better than you can imagine. All 6 offerings harken their true fruits, and differ from each other in pretty pronounced ways.
I’m not really one to “describe” candy flavors (it’s…..”woodsy”!), especially in this case- they all really taste like fruit, but so much more luxurious. The grapefruit, one of my favorite flavors of all time, knocked my socks off. But then I tried the Marion blackberry, and had a new favorite. It went like that, on and on and on and then I had to stop myself and save some for later.
There’s a lot to like with these. First, I appreciate the natural ingredients, and the candy being made as it should-nothing weird or fancy, just traditional candy making with great ingredients. Second, I love that they’re made here in the US – I’m tired of having trouble finding high quality fruit jellies! Which leads me to my next point: the price. This gargantuan 12 ounce box sells on their website for $17.95. Perhaps that sounds pricey to you, but trust me- it’s not. It’s pretty darn inexpensive for these confections, especially for this amount.
If you like fruit jellies at all, I recommend….no. I implore. Yep, I’m imploring you to buy a box and check them out. They have various sizes on their site, so you don’t have to go with the big boy box, but…you know you’re going to. These are so silky smooth, tangy, fruity, and enjoyable to eat, that I PROMISE they won’t stick around your house long. Your kids will love the “healthy” candy. YOU will love the “amazing” candy.
And if you’re silly enough to bring them in to work to share, your co-workers will gain newfound respect for you. Hell, you’ll probably land that promotion and move to the corner office near old man Jenkins. Yes, you’ll have to buy him a box for Christmas every year, but I think you’ll agree that’s a small price to pay when compared to the size of the raise you just got.
However….if you’ don’t buy them….sadly, none of these god things will happen to you, and you’ll be sitting in your shitty cubicle, eating that “fun size” Three Muskateers bar you found in the break room once again. You’re better than that, dammit.