Last night I opened up a variety of Haribo I’ve never seen before : Mini Color-Rado. They’re “almost” exactly like the Color-Rado variety but…tiny!(more on that later). It’s as if the big bag was put in front of a Sid & Marty Croft shrink ray. All the pieces are perfectly tiny, colorful, and dare I say gorgeous? Regardless, I bagged them.
No, I didn’t assemble the bag, seal it, and provide it to German retailers for sale. I “bagged ’em”! I just invented this term. You use it when you consume an entire bag of something. Last night I bagged these big time. Why? They’re so damn tiny and cute, it’s as if you’re eating nothing at all! But the flavors…they’re not small at all.
The Haribo Color-Rado mix, and this Mini Color-Rado mix, combine an assortment of gummies, foam gummies, a few round…”puffy” candies, and a variety of different licorices. Plain licorice, chocolate licorice, coconut licorice. Here’s the trippy thing: I like the large pieces, but I don’t love them. The mini size though? Cream Dream.
Look, I like to eat. Get with the program, it’s like number 1 or 2 of my favorite things to do (don’t forget power gardening). When I’m faced with eating 8 or 9 pieces of large sized candy or 30-40 small sized pieces, there IS no choice : I’m gonna go small. More is better.
…Unless more is referring to backfat, in which case it’s not better. And that’s another compelling reason for the mini size – more chewing, more different flavors, and an overall feeling that you’re getting more bang for your calories. If you care about that sort of thing.
These definitely won’t work for someone who’s not into licorice. Even for someone who is, the combination of chocolate and coconut is a bit too weird to combine with gummies for some. Me? I dig it, because it’s different. Also, the flavor of the chocolate and coconut licorice combos is just delightful. But none of that matters, because unless you have a uber-friend who lives in the UK like our Susie, you’re shit out of luck. You can’t get these here.
However….you can get the large sized variety. I’m gonna “double however” you now though- However, the large size has something in it that the mini mix doesn’t-notably, something gross. An orange wrapped licorice. Note to world, orange and licorice doesn’t work! At least not for me, and I was the only one around for the “bagging”, so that’s all that matters. While we’re at it, can we agree to keep orange away from chocolate too? Cripes, its a gross combo.
That orange thing taints the whole big bag for me. Look, I can’t be laying on the couch, pulling handfuls of this crap out of the bag, and getting burned with the orange and pink colors. No, friends. I’d have to actually sit up, and look at what I’m doing, pull them out….so obviously that’s out of the question.
Nay. Fie even! Fie, I say! Fie to Haribo for dissing us, the American red-headed step-children, with the lamer variety of the two.
If Haribo were standing in front of me trying to explain themselves, I’d simply put my gloves and top hat on, walk by, and say “Good DAY, sir.” Then, when they tried to stop me, I’d scream “I SAID GOOD DAY!!”.
That’d learn ’em.
yeah, these are awesome. Shame, really.