We may be sour, but we know our sweets.

Toxic Waste Hi Voltage Bubble Gum

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What make a good chewing gum? Think back-what’s YOUR favorite gum? Mine would definitely still have to be classic Bubble Yum. It had that perfect grainy sweet texture that was totally revolutionary at the time. The flavor was solid, the bubbles were huge, it was a pre-teen party. The main competition of course, was Bubblicious-which was OK, but the consistency was different. It had a harder, waxy sheen when you chewed it, and wasn’t nearly as enjoyable for me.

30 years later, I’m still chewing gum, and today, it’s Toxic Waste Hi Voltage Bubble Gum. The Toxic part refers to it being sour-in fact, these tubes of plenty have sour powder in the middle of the gum. I’m excited.

But before I review them, let me make it clear that I’m always on the lookout for a good sour gum. There just aren’t any. There’s three issues that need tackling when you’re talking about a sour gum, and I haven’t found one yet that succeeds at all three:1. Flavor. Not the sour power, but the flavor-does it taste good?
2. Sour kick. Does the sour last for 10 seconds, then the gum packs no punch?
3. Chewing consistency-is it an enjoyable chew, after a few minutes, even after 15 minutes?The flavors in Toxic Waste are a mixed bag. The green apple and strawberry are both pretty damn good. But the blue raspberry? Yuck-it’s foul. And not in any way that’s anything like any other blue rasp flavor I’ve ever had before. It’s totally synthetic tasting, with a weird chemical tone. Not good.  But beyond not good, I mean it’s really fucking BAD.  I thought that I had eaten tainted gum with some ammonia or Anthrax mixed in, it was that “off” tasting.  I think you can pass off mediocre flavors to kids, but this shit isn’t gonna fly.  And it’s not cool.  After all, there’s no need to invent a fake flavor that doesn’t exist in nature if it’s gonna taste like poop.As for sour power, well, …they’re kind of a mixed bag on this too. Generally speaking, this is one of the more sour gums I’ve chewed, and it keeps the essence of the sour power for a pretty good amount of time. Oddly though, the green apple flavor is WAY more sour than the other two, almost to the point of not being able to chew it. Overall though, this gum succeeds at the sour test.

Chewing consistency-here’s where Toxic Waste Hi Voltage gets shocked. After about 20 seconds, the gum gets hard. You must have experienced this before-gum gets hard after a minute, tough to chew, and generally nukes any hope of bubble blowing, and then you spit it out. Well, get ready to experience it again if you ever buy these.

Need I go on? It’s a shame, ’cause these almost made the cut. I can forgive one poopy flavor, and I appreciate the longevity of the sour power. But a chewing gum that’s ass to chew? Not a winning recipe.

Bottom Line : Sour as can be, but ultimately a failure