We may be sour, but we know our sweets.

Not Just Cereal: Sugar Cereal Covered in Sugar

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“Breakfast Shmeakfast!”

“Now you can eat candy right when you get up!”

“Milk and cookies? I’ll take 2 bowls!”

I’m trying to come up with clever little ad slogans for Not Just Cereal candy.
Not bad, no?
Speaking of not bad… These things? Yumbalish.

What are they exactly? Oh just little fun boxes filled with yr favorite sweet cereals covered in chocolate that would make any kid under the age of 10 rid their DVRs of Hannah Montana for a year straight to get another fix.

So I confess I watch a lot of Seinfeld and like him, I like cereal. I’d eat it all the time if it didn’t fill me with empty calories. My fam has at least 3-4 kinds of cereal in our pantry at any given time. Although…now we only have organic cereals because I watched that goddamn movie Food Inc. and ever since then food freaks me out…Oh, except this candy known as Not Just Cereal, cuz there’s No WAY these are all natural. But that’s OK! Cuz what these have is ridiculosity mixed in with your secret pleasure: the best sugar cereals your mom would never buy, like Fruit Loops, covered in chocolate. And Golden Grahams – covered in chocolate. And Rice Krispies – covered in chocolate. Not to mention Honey Nut Cheerios (sorry, I mean “Honey Toasted O’s”) – wait for it… – covered in chocolate.

Oh really? You don’t think you’d like these? Hm. Let’s see. Cereal. Check. Covered in chocolate. Check. Oh yeah, I’m Sure us fat assed Americans will never want what we already OVER-eat all the time on their own. And please. You KNOW deep down when you were 7, you always dreamed your Cheerios were covered in a chocolate mess. That’s why you loved Count Chocula for chrissakes. So don’t pretend you’d shrug these candies off with a “eh – no thanks!” I aint being born yesterday, yo.

Looks like choco donuts no? But these are small. Small like…hmm…CEREAL

I thought I wouldn’t like the Fruit Looped ones but I did, a lot. The choco-covering really brought out the fake flavors! The Cinnamon Toasted Crunch ones were a given. I didn’t even need to eat those to tell you they were good.

I will say, however — it ain’t all unicorns and rainbows. The chocolate is milky, and I’m a dark guy. Also, it’s too sweet. Add that too-sweet chocolate mixed with already-sweet cereal = tummy ache. I couldn’t eat too much in one sitting. But still, once I purge a little – I’ll be back baby!

Question for the fine confectioner’s at Nassau candy who make these things: Whaaaa – no Cap’n Crunch? Or even better – Peanut Butter Cap’n Crunch? I can draw up a venn diagram if you want, but c’mon – you really need a marketing genius to tell you the demand for such a supply would be large and in charge? I’ll look for them in Not Just Cereal ver 2.0. Great. Talk then.

FYI – you can find these things at Walmart. And according to the Not Just Cereal site, only Walmart. Which is great because Walmart treats their employees like crap AND they destroy local businesses! Exactly the place I want to buy my favorite candy.



2 Comments

  1. Did you try this with milk? Curious if they’d be great or horrid that way.

  2. We do the PR for Not Just Cereal. You can have milk with it! It’s great. In fact, the chocolate coating keeps the cereal nice and crunchy. Enjoy.

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