5 Freshest | Candy Gurus

Dried Guava Balls: Not Sure a Better Name Saves These

Reviewed by Matty on May 20, 2013

Gritty and dirty meet tropical something

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Dandy’s Coconut / Coconut & Ginger Candies

Reviewed by Jonny on May 17, 2013

Do you hate coconut? Olives? Ginger? Hard Candies? Then read on!

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Ramune Gummies: Flower Power Pop

Reviewed by Matty on May 15, 2013

More soda gummies but there ain't no coke in these

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Båren Company: Coffee Gummi Bears are Buzzin

Reviewed by Matty on May 8, 2013

I'm so tired. I need a gummy bear. Stat.

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Trolli Sour Stixi

Reviewed by Jonny on May 2, 2013

With a pretty unique consistency, this offering from Trolli continues their track record of excellence overseas

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Sula Toffee To Go “Kaffeecreme”

Reviewed by Jonny on Apr 25, 2013

Caramel goes with salt. This we know. But does it go with coffee? What about white chocolate? Porjk Belly?

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Dewars Fine Candies : Bakersfield’s Finest

Reviewed by Jonny on Apr 18, 2013

I think I might have liked taffy when I was 4, but now? They all taste the same: bland, boring. And now we have more to try...

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Ocho Coconut Bar: When Price is No Object

Reviewed by Matty on Apr 15, 2013

Great coconut. Perfect for the rich!

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Haribo Smurfs: The American Version

Reviewed by Matty on Apr 8, 2013

When you want to eat animated characters, start here

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Venco Licorice Chalk : School’s In Session Yo.

Reviewed by Jonny on Apr 4, 2013

Get ready to CHALK this up to experience. (taps microphone).......Is this thing on?

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Jolly Rancher Sour Bunnies: Annual Gel Fest? Eh.

Reviewed by Matty on Apr 1, 2013

There was a time when Jolly Rancher was a one-trick pony – hard brick candies in watermelon, green apple, cherry,...

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Fruchtgummi Vom Feinstein is NOT a Jewish Vampire. It’s an amazing candy confectioner that you need to know about NOW.

Reviewed by Jonny on Mar 28, 2013

Flavor combinations that put what we're used to eating to shame....

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Jelly Belly Sour Bunnies: It’s What’s for Easter

Reviewed by Matty on Mar 25, 2013

When the sweet people at Jelly Belly send us Gurus stuff to review, in this case, Easter Candy, I have to ask myself:...

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Zoe’s Chocolate Co. : Two Bars For Review

Reviewed by Jonny on Mar 21, 2013

What's gona be better: animal crackers in milk chocolate, or jelly beans in dark? Serious first world issue to ponder.

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Baci means Kiss in Italian. Maybe should mean French Kiss.

Reviewed by Matty on Mar 18, 2013

Italians and their food. Let's let them keep making it.

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Gustaf’s Dutch Licorice Cats

Reviewed by Jonny on Mar 15, 2013

More quality licorice out of Holland....

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Classic Candy Review : The Astro Pop

Reviewed by Jonny on Mar 11, 2013

Time Machine back to summer, 1975. Sand? Check. Sun? Check. Sunscreen? Nope. no one cared back then.

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Who’s Up For Some Bourbon or Guinness Beer (Marshmallows)?

Reviewed by Jonny on Mar 7, 2013

Guinness beer. Makers Mark Bourbon. Shit's getting real up in here.

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Trolli Gummi Rocks…..Rock.

Reviewed by Jonny on Mar 4, 2013

Gummi inside, "hard" sour shell outside. New concept, and I LIKE IT.

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Haribo Goliath : Gigantor Black Licorice From The Champs

Reviewed by Jonny on Mar 1, 2013

This is what standard, basic licorice SHOULD taste like. Usually not so much. But in this case, yes!

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Sugar Daddy: A Virtual Spanking?

Reviewed by Jonny on Feb 26, 2013

Everyone needs a Sugar Daddy, unless you actually ARE a daddy, in which case it might be an uncomfortable arrangement.

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Jolly Rancher Chews : Should You…CHOOSE Them? OH NO I DI-IN’T!!!

Reviewed by Jonny on Feb 21, 2013

Hey, it's a review of something you can actually BUY in this country! BUT SHOULD YOU???

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It’s Valentine’s Day. Do You REALLY Think These Gobstoppers Will Help?

Reviewed by Jonny on Feb 14, 2013

Lots of first world problems for me today, but enough about me: let's talk about YOU. And what the HELL you're gonna do for Valentine's Day! You're a mess!

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Wild Ophelia: Beef Jerky Milk Chocolate Brings Wisps of Animal

Reviewed by Matty on Feb 11, 2013

I know I know... when we think 'chocolate' we all think 'beef'. Nothing new here. Oh WAIT A MINUTE!

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Ahoj-Brause Halloween Bonbons : Is it Halloween Yet? Please?

Reviewed by Jonny on Feb 8, 2013

Some people "don't like hard candy". These are the same people that "aren't allowed to be near children" and who "eat their own dandruff". I'm sure of it.

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Trolli Valentine Mix: Sour Gummi Candy be Dandy

Reviewed by Matty on Feb 6, 2013

Don't lie to me about what your candy tastes like. I'm not 19. It won't make me want to sleep with you more. Also, Happy Valentine's Day.

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Tahoe City Chocolates, Munch, and Old Faithful Peanut Clusters

Reviewed by Jonny on Feb 1, 2013

Come with me, won't you, as I take a stroll through the aisles of Tahoe City Chocolates, and uncover som gems old and new.

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Skinny Cow: “Divine Chocolates” that Don’t Fatten You Up

Reviewed by Matty on Jan 28, 2013

When you're fat, you diet. But you got to still eat candy. Because why make life any shittier?

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Haribo Jelly Beans : Yet Another Player in the Bean Game

Reviewed by Jonny on Jan 25, 2013

We’ve reviewed and spoken about jelly beans quite a bit round these parts. Every year before Easter rolls...

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Dude, Seriously. Mamba Sour Gummies are Kinda Awesome.

Reviewed by Jonny on Jan 17, 2013

I talk a lot of smack about Mamba. Cool name, pretty lame candies. Will this Mamba gummie be any different? SPOILER ALERT: yes, it will. Very. A lot much very.

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Mentos Lakrits Mint : Licomint

Reviewed by Jonny on Jan 11, 2013

Mint, Licorice, Chew, Repeat, Rinse.

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Haribo Hot Sticks: Ginger Never Tasted So Imported

Reviewed by Matty on Jan 7, 2013

Did you know Germany was name after Ginger? It grows everywhere over there. Seriously.

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Swedish Jelly Horses : Fruity Syrup

Reviewed by Jonny on Jan 4, 2013

In a world...where one old dude finds a mystical wood horse that smells like syrup. Coming soon to a theater near you.

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It’s a Spicy New Year with Tabasco Jelly Belly’s

Reviewed by Matty on Jan 2, 2013

Tabasco on pizza is a prerequisite to eating, in most cases. Tabasco in your jelly beans is just a smidge different.

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Haribo Christmas

Reviewed by Jonny on Dec 25, 2012

I was actually a 4th alternate on trombone for the 1984 recording of "Do They Know it's Christmas?". Didn't make the cut. Still brag about it, though.

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