We may be sour, but we know our sweets.

Cry Baby Eggs

The year was 1981. Leo Sayer was crushing it on mom's AM radio. It was hot, mom was driving the carpool, and I was chewing Gator Gum. Like a BOSS.

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M&M’s Chocolate Bar: You Can’t Screw this Up…Right?

Re-imagining a good thing left this reviewer cold

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I’ve Seen Hell, My Friends: And It’s Filthy With Spogs

I’m still shuddering.   Recently I contacted Aunty Nellie’s Sweet Shop in Ireland to get my hands on...

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Happy Halloween! These are Terrible Coconut Candies!

Bad coconut candy may scare the hell out of you. Run!

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Halloween Terror Candy – Katjes Black Owls

You'll be cursed for 7 years if you even LOOK at these.

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Haribo Parade : A Parade of Sad Clowns

Haribo knows gummies, and they know sour. Hell, they even know bananas. But do they know licorice?

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PB&J’s: Cursing the Name of Peanut Butter

PB&J's has a name that says "simpler days", "mom loves me" and "yum". These bars though say "your stoopid", "you have no taste" and "screw you".

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Outback Beans

We loves us somes licorice. And candy coated? Delight, right?

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Shanghai Surprise

Here we go again: Let's try once more to see if China is offering anything interesting in the way of candy these days.

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Sour Punch Bits Tangerine & Lemonade. They’re Orange At Least.

Tangerine Lemonade. Chewy. Gummy. Sour. These can only be amazing.

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Jelly Belly Peas & Carrots: Look but Don’t Taste

I've had these things for months waiting for the right time to review. 'The right time' in this case is that I have nothing else to review right now.

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Aussie Style Licorice : Pineapple and Marionberry

Anyone ever heard of a Marionberry? Licorice intrigues me.

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Edinburgh Castle Rock – It’s Like “The Human Centipede 2”

What does "The Human Centipede 2" and childhood sidewalk art have in common?

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Uncle Oinker’s Strawberry Flavored Gummy Bacon

Amazingness or Putridicity?

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Jolly Rancher Awesome Twosome Chews: No. Na’wesome.

I love Ranchers. Old school yummles. So it's perfectly logical for me to expect Rancher Chews - with the word "awesome" in the title - to be just that, no?

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Uncle Oinker’s Savory Bacon Mints: Um. Oinkaaay…

I mean really how good do you THINK they are

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Wonka Chewy Gobstoppers: Thanks for Giving Mediocrity

And I'm thankful for weak flavored anti-gobstoppers

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Baseball and Rodents – Haribo Susse Mause

Mice never tasted so...horrible.

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Twizzlers Sweet and Soft Sour Poo Nozzles

Baby poo or zit insides? Either way, not good news.

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2010: The Year of Mierda Candy

Every year I like to do a candy bash post. For 2010, may I forever pray you don't go anywhere near the three candies in this post.

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A Cornucopia of Asian…Candy?

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My knee AND this Dorian fruit candy both are assholes.

The most exotic fruit in the world gets the candy treatment! Get your nose ready...

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Dollah Dollah Bill Y’all!

Nice coin slot!

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Serpentinas – slithering around bad taste

It’s not fair to blame the masses for the faults of a few. Like, you can’t say every Iranian is a numbnut;...

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Dulche Suave De Leche- Not So Suave.

Dulche de Leche done...right? Or just done?

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Skwinkles. Is Tasting Like Ass the Objective Here?

Salsa on candy? Really? Hey Skwinkles: I couldn't not like you less.

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Tropical Chewy Lemonheads & Friends

Get ready for a re-calibration of expectations. These little balls of fury have everything going for them-in theory...

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Circus Peanuts: It’s not you it’s me

Who's eating these things? Are they doing it in public?

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Boys on the Town Talking Tappsy

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