We may be sour, but we know our sweets.

Bit o’ Yummy, but Honey in my Tummy?

Author

Sorry about the title of this one. Kinda cracks me up. But cute titles like this actually annoy the hell out of me. My bad!

Per a request from avid reader and The Assistant’s filmmaker, I’m reviewing the good ol standby, Bit O’ Honey.

(something tells me I didn’t grab the right pic for this one…)
Let’s just dispose of the obvious:
- It’s an old candy. I’m pretty certain the packaging is exactly the same it was in 1924. The colors for sure are.
- We all had this as a kid. And most likely you didn’t want it at first since it wasn’t some crazy purple color, and it wasn’t chocolate, and it was hard. Plus it wasn’t like you got a ton of it. It sure as hell wasn’t like a pack of Dynamints for 25 cents where you got seemingly 100s of little sugar pills.
- We all didn’t actually think we’d like it, right? I’m pretty certain if I didn’t get one in my ’70s Halloween trick o treat go ’round, I never would have tried Bit O’ Honey. I was probably 10 years old, it was December 8th, there were 3 pieces of detritus at the bottom of the frayed grocery bag, I needed some kind of quick high … so I freaking acquiesced; unwrapped the little hard piece of tan brown crap and threw it in my mouth.And now where are we? They are goddarned good. Bit O’ Honey are good. I knew it when I first had it and I know it now. In case you forgot – let’s run it down.They start hard as hell but you know with a little salival effort things will soften eventually. But it takes a long while — long enough that when you first open the package you might have wished you had more for your $ but by the time you finish one you wonder if you will need more than two.

They don’t start too sweet. kinda caramely. Kinda smooth. As you work them in, they get a bit grainy. Then you play with them in your teeth, flipping them around and around, under the tongue, squashing them one way, then trying to squash them the other way. They loosen up but not too much. They stick to the teeth but not like caramel. Not stringy chewy.

And finally — they don’t really taste like honey. I’m sure it’s in there somewhere – I’m not calling BS on Nestle truth in marketing (like the British ASA called BS on Apple, who’s marketing iPhone as able to get to all the parts of the Internet, except Flash or Java — which are absolutely necessary for the full Web experience…ahem…oh wait. That’s my other job. Sorry). But for me, honey is different. It’s kinda smoky. Reallly sticky. And “Flavored.” And not a flavor I like all that much. I like my sugarness just to be sweet. I don’t want much taste to it. I leave the taste to the man-made chemicals. I love honey with peanut butter though….

Bottom Line:

Bit O’ Honey is remarkably aptly named as far as I can tell and I like it. Well worth a retry if you haven’t partaken in the last 20 years.

 

 

 

  • Steve

    Wow talk about fast service.

    I heartily concur with your in depth and detailed analysis of this strange treat. I have always been ambivalent myself. Never seeking the “Bit” but always being pleasantly surprised by it’s bizarre toothefullnes when it inexplicably found its way into my mouth.

    This blog is a serious service to humanity.

    Thanks

  • Steve

    Wow talk about fast service.

    I heartily concur with your in depth and detailed analysis of this strange treat. I have always been ambivalent myself. Never seeking the “Bit” but always being pleasantly surprised by it’s bizarre toothefullnes when it inexplicably found its way into my mouth.

    This blog is a serious service to humanity.

    Thanks

  • Denise Ryan

    Is this a guy thing? I think it’s the challenge – the more difficult the candy is to eat, the more you guys like it! I’ve always felt the Bit o’ Honey wasn’t worth the effort. And I think the fact you haven’t had one in 20 YEARS backs me up! No one sits around and actually wants a Bit o’ Honey! But you know I love the blog! And about that picture…..: )

  • Candy Gurus

    I know the pic…hmmm…not sure if it’s PC or not. I keep waiting for a cease and desist letter of some kind…